It’s 12 degrees and sunny outside!

It’s spring in London today. And look at me dad, I’m wearing the new coat you gave me. No ‘Lilla My’ knot on my head but I feel pretty smashing anyway.

Hope you guys aren’t dying in the cold over there. I heard we got a new princess tough, that’s something to celebrate. Born on the same day as my friend Ben. We are celebrating him this weekend. I’ll make a toast to our little princess as well.

Ångest

Ångest, ångest är min arvedel,
min strupes sår,
mitt hjärtas skri i världen.

Nu styvnar löddrig sky i nattens grova hand,
nu stiga skogarna
och stela höjder så kargt mot himmelens förkrympta valv.
Hur hårt är allt,
hur stelnat, svart och stilla!

Jag famlar kring i detta dunkla rum,
jag känner klippans vassa kant mot mina fingrar,
jag river mina uppåtsträckta händer
till blods mot molnens frusna trasor.

Ack, mina naglar sliter jag från fingrarna,
mina händer river jag såriga, ömma
mot berg och mörknad skog,
mot himlens svarta järn
och mot den kalla jorden!

Ångest, ångest är min arvedel,
min strupes sår,
mitt hjärtas skri i världen.

(Lagerkvist)

En ghasell

Jag står och ser på världen genom gallret;
jag kan, jag vill ej slita mig från gallret,
det är så skönt att se, hur livet sjuder
och kastar höga böljor upp mot gallret,
så smärtsamt glatt och lockande det ljuder,
när skratt och sånger komma genom gallret.

Det skiftar ljust av asp och al och björk,
där ovanför står branten furumörk,
den friska doften tränger genom gallret.
Och över viken vilket präktigt sken, i varje droppe är en ädelsten,
se, hur det skimrar härligt genom gallret!

Det vimlar båtar där och ångare
med hornmusik och muntra sångare
och glada människor i tusental,
som draga ut till fest i berg och dal;
jag vill, jag vill, jag skall, jag måste ut
och dricka liv, om blott för en minut,
jag vill ej långsamt kvävas bakom gallret!

Förgäves skall jag böja, skall jag rista
det gamla obevekligt hårda gallret
– det vill ej tänja sig, det vill ej brista,
ty i mig själv är smitt och nitat gallret,
och först när själv jag krossas, krossas gallret.

(Fröding)

True people

Yesterday was quiet. Birthday weekend is over and I’m back on the treadmill eating culinary master pieces like baked beans and peas. That’s how it goes down hill when Oliver is away. He would never allow me to eat something like that.

I’ve started watching the swedish series Äkta Människor. I like it. It’s well executed and the idea of robots in our society hits home when it’s set in Sweden. I’m not a fan of robots generally but this one raises the important questions on how we value life and humanity. Especially the portrayal of the movement ‘Äkta människor’, who wants get rid of all the robots, actualities important questions well tied into what is going on in Europe, and Sweden, today.

For tonight – gym, peas and robots.

Doing London in a weekend

A collection of random picture from the weekend (sometimes I’m way off with my picture taking). Mum and Dad was here and we spent the weekend talking about the future, walking west london round and eating. 

On Saturday we met up with Oliver’s family and walked around in the cute japanese garden in Holland Park (it only took me about 2 years to get there).

The fish almost scared me, they were BIG. But cool. Big ass fishes looking like the would happily take a bite if you fell in from the rickety rackety bridge we were standing on.

Evening time we started with pink bubbles at ours and then we went to the maroccan restaurant Azou in Hammersmith. It was really good. I failed miserably at taking any pictures of the food and the place but behind this self love you can see the table cloth (and if you look closely at the picture you can see my fashion statement of a tiny Mohawk thingy were someone put sticky stuff in my hair and I had to cut it off by the scalp. Oh the joys if being 10 and boys doing that to you)

I put mum and dad to bed and went with Elin, Tom and Ida to the box. You weren’t allowed to photograph but I sneaked this one in. Elin owning before the show started. Great night. Free shots do that to you.

Sunday! Went to Westfields with the old folks and after a sunday roast for lunch i was beaten. Home for popcorn and movie while the others were out doing the fashion week. You know you are getting older when you are not even jealous.

Miss you

There was a gift in my mail yesterday. A picture from Filippa on the two of us a late night on a roof top in NY. We have stolen the boy who lived there hats (we felt kind of super cool) and were up there all night completely living the moment of the fact that we were in NY with our best friends. One of those movie moments.

That’s why I love my girls from back home. They share my passion for living life. For traveling, meeting new people, experience. Nothing is too weird, no situation is too dangerous. You always land on your feet with a story to tell.

I miss them, my NY girls. I miss Filippa’s way of challenging me, making me grow by questioning me with fierce loyalty. I miss talking about life and love with Sanna and then go out and dance all through the night. I miss Maggie’s sweetness and care and all her ideas.

And all the fun we’ve had. More than anything I think about laughing with these girls. Doing silly, crazy, fun things making new memories.

A life in neon

It’s not really showing in this picture exactly how neon this sweater is. Its neon! As in my colleauges pretend to shield their eyes neon.

I, of course, love it. I’m back to the colour and happiness thing. You cant be anything but very happy in a neon sweater like this. And dream about going to a rave party. I would like to dress up in a full on neon outfit and dance all night.

All that is good in life

Had a quiet night in yesterday, after all the birthday craziness it was well needed. Me and Oliver went out for dinner at the local kebab place and then back to the sofa, sweets and Deadwood. Some more people were killed and fed to the pigs.

I’ve realized I have the worst diet given modern findings. This whole LCHF dieting stuff. I live on sweets. The food in general isnt that bad but I eat sweets every day. I wonder if I’m going to shrivel up and die one day (erhm, I do realize I will shrivel up and die one day, that’s what people do, but i mean ‘go before my time’). If you listen to the general standing I probably will. Sugar seems to be directly related to everything that is bad in life.

I think it’s very closely connected to everything that is good in life. Like laying on the sofa watching people die horrible deaths while eating salty liquorice that sets your mouth in fire and cuddling with your vampire looking boyfriend.

The birthday dream that never ended

My day ended as amazing as it started. After work and a bit of a faff in the tube trying to escort 4 balloons in rush hour I got back to the flat for some wine and cheese and then dinner at the pub.

I got some more cakes. All in all 5 cakes in a day, must be some record for me. 

All my friends were there (yes, I know, the pictures are not very good. I went on to take pictures on Olivers camera after this. They weren’t very good either. I blame the photographer)

The cake wonder! Only me, Tompa and Oliver liked it. But I really, really liked it. It was good but mostly for the taste of love. Elin actually made my weird fantasy cake come true. That IS love.

Oliver gave me a beautiful bracelet. It’s so me. But also so him (its a kind of twist opening mechanism that only he can operate. So to use it I need him. Smart man) and that makes it even better. He also gave me a framed picture from when he was in Sweden. It’s like a little piece of home. 

Miranda gave me this awesome picture. I mean for real. She painted a picture with vampire teeth and 80’s peach. It’s also so me! And contrary to what she said I am so allowed to love it.